NOT KNOWING IS OK
“And all those who heard it marveled at those things which were told them by the shepherds. But Mary kept all these things and collected (συμβάλλουσα) them in her heart.” (Lk 2: 18-19)
Mary, the Mother of God, witnessed many events, the meaning of which She did not entirely understand at the time these events occurred. There was much uncertainty and ambivalence in Her life. For example, when She and Joseph found themselves with no place to stay, when it came time for Her to give birth. God didn’t seem to be providing for them, even though the new-born Child, as She knew, was no ordinary One. But She simply accepts the ambivalence, keeping these things in Her heart.
God sends me uncertainty and ambivalence as well. I don’t always understand what’s going on, or what is going to happen, in relationships, in financial matters, and various other situations. But when the uncertainty begins to dampen my spirits, let me remind myself that God does, in fact, know, and understand, everything far better than I do. Let me pray today for His will for me, even if I don’t know or understand it, and the grace to realize it in my life..